Lesbian Couple Who Conceived IVF Twins Want To Meet Donor Dad

A lesbian couple who used IVF to conceive their twins decided they want to meet their twin’s biological father when they found him accidentally on Facebook.

While travelling overseas on a sabbatical in 2014, Brooke Creemers and Jocelyn Baayens, from Western Australia, decided to go ahead with their dream to start a family.

For them, it was important to do a reciprocal IVF, where one woman provides the egg while the other gives birth. However, this procedure is only possible in Australia if the couple has fertility problems. So, they looked into other places where they could do it and decided on a clinic in Cancun, Mexico.

For two months, the couple browsed details of donors before deciding on an anonymous Mexican sperm donor, who had a “face shape similar to Jocelyn”. “His profile read nicely and his medical history was good. He appealed to us,” Brooke said.

In November 2014, they pushed through with a round of reciprocal IVF and fell pregnant. They went back to Australia at the end of December and in January, found out they were pregnant with twins.

In March last year, Brooke was going through her Facebook when a picture of the IVF clinic coordinator came up in her feed. The clinic coordinator was with a few friends and one person caught Brooke’s attention. She looked closer and realised it was the same face on her sperm donor’s files.

After a few weeks of contemplation, the couple decided they wanted to meet the man tagged in the photo.

“I felt a bit of guilt. I realised there were far more consequences than we had considered. It didn’t occur to me how major it is for some people, to have their father in their life. I thought this was an opportunity and I wanted to open that door. Otherwise there was never a way for our boys to meet him,” Brooke said.

She said she was nervous because she didn’t want to intrude on his life, but thought it was a good idea for them all to connect. She contacted the clinic coordinator who confirmed the man was indeed their donor, Joel.

She immediately messaged Joel, who replied that he was very shocked but also happy they had reached out. From then on, they started sharing stories of each other’s lives over Facebook. Turns out, Joel is also gay and thought donating will be great after hearing different stories from his friend at the clinic. “He didn’t know he would be helping a gay couple, he just thought it would be helping someone who needed it,” Brooke said.

The couple remained in contact until the twins, Sebastian and Lachlan, were born, seven weeks premature, on June 26, 2015 and they sent Joel one of the first photos of the babies. “He was amazed, blessed and thankful all this had happened,” Brooke said.

Today, they all video chat regularly and have since decided they all should meet.

The couple have set up a GoFundMe page with hopes of collecting $3,500 to help pay for Joel’s flights and passport.

“Initially we just thought we would keep in touch and send some photos and maybe when the boys were old enough, they could decide if they wanted to meet him. But as we went on, we felt introducing him earlier to the boys would make it less abnormal for them. They can know him as whomever, whatever that will be, he will be familiar to them,” Brooke said.

As for the money to be raised, Brooke said that regardless of what money they raise, it is important to bring the two families, from opposite sides of the world, together.

Source: Kidspot.com.au