House Of Horrors Victim Proves We Should Know Our Neighbours

As yet another ‘house of horrors’ victim emerges from the mass of gloomy news stories that you’ll read today, we think it’s time to take stock. Something has changed in our society, and we aren’t going to let it stand any more.

Do you remember a time when you knew your neighbours? I do. When I was younger I lived next door to an old Greek couple who loved to garden. Every weekend they would spend hours hobbling around and pruning, and the man would give me little flowers as I hung over his fence and watched. Our neighbours across the road were a lawyer and a retired teacher. We swam in their pool, enjoyed dinners, shared birthdays and essentially absorbed their only son into our family. Now, neighbours are strangers, and the changes are clear.

Katherine’s Story

On an average street in Melbourne a girl experienced some of the worst sexual and physical abuse Australia has ever seen for three whole decades. Likened, if not worse than, the terrible stories that came out of the Fritzl house and the Castro house, Katherine was a prisoner in her own home for thirty years. During this time, she was beaten, raped and totally controlled by her father. He controlled her money, where she went, the clothes she wore and even who she spoke to. Every minute of her life occurred with his permission only.

She was only 12 years old the first time that she was raped, and became so habituated that she thought the process was normal. At 25 years old she gave birth to her own half-brother, had two miscarriages at 27 and 31 before bearing two more sons at 33 and 35. At age 36 she also had a daughter, but the baby died at just 12 weeks old.

Incredibly, Katherine reported her father and the abuse she was suffering to social workers and even the police not just once, but 22 times. Nothing was done. She was labelled a liar and entirely ignored by the system and those who could have helped her. Finally, one Senior Constable took her seriously, did DNA tests on her children, and realised the unbelievable truth. He arrested and charged her father, who is now serving 22 years as Katherine is free to live her life.

What Does That Have To Do With Me?

Honestly? Nothing. This story is just one example of how easy it is for vulnerable Australians to fall through the cracks in our society. I always wonder in these situations: what were their neighbours thinking? Did they see Katherine struggling to get through the day? Did they notice her haunted look, or the way she always looked for the shadow of her father over her shoulder? Did they notice and, thinking it was none of their business, ignore it?

It’s my personal belief that your neighbours serve a purpose in a community. Some people might not agree with me, but I think they’re there to keep an eye on things. Not rubbernecking over the fence and snooping on your day-to-day life, but just keeping track of the people who share a fence, or even a wall, with. These people aren’t your family, and they might not even be your friends, but having an occasional conversation with them has benefits for everyone.

If you don’t believe me, here are some of the positives about getting to know your neighbours.

They Can Entertain Your Kids 

You’ve got kids, they’ve got kids, there’s no need to organise play dates now! Just let your brood and theirs run wild together between both houses, providing both parents with some time to chill.

They Can Look Out For You and Yours

Neighbours are a great source of information about what’s been happening in the neighbourhood (i.e. break-ins etc) or what’s going on in general. If you’re planning on going away and you know your neighbours, leave your number and ask them to give you a call if anything happens while you’re gone. That way, you’ll be prepared.

They Can Keep On Top Of Things

How many times as a kid did I do the mail and pet feeding run for my neighbours when they went on holidays? All the time! And they were always there to help us out when we went away, or reward our effort with a batches of chocolate brownies. Yes please!

They Can Lend You Things 

My mum’s old neighbour was essentially her Bunnings rental for the five years she lived in her little apartment. That man had every power tool known in the world. In response, she would lend an egg here or there, or a cup of flour when his wife had forgotten something in the shopping.

They Make You Feel Safer

Being alone in a house is a scary thing, but when you know your neighbours it doesn’t feel that scary at all. It’s like being in a big community of people who you know will look out for you, and you look out for them as well.

It’s become a trend not to know our neighbours that well. Maybe it’s caused by the fact that people move more often, and renting is increasingly common. But even if you’re only living somewhere temporarily, the benefits of getting to know the people who live around you are clear. Plus, keeping an eye on your community is one way to stop girls like Katherine falling through the cracks. I wonder what might have happened if just one neighbour had noticed something was wrong and spoken up. Maybe she wouldn’t have suffered as she did for so long.

So, do you know your neighbours?

Featured image is just a stock photo.