The Hashtag That Has Everyone Talking

I know it. You know it. He knows it. Abortion is not talked about. Not at home, not at work, no even among friends.

It holds a stigma of the worst kind, identified with more disgrace, shame and hate than any other female-associated word in the dictionary. Worse than domestic violence and rape combined. Worse even than murder. Why? Because these words are talked about. And abortion is not.

But this week one brave woman put the stigma of abortion on show though a global platform using the hashtag #ShoutYourAbortion, following the revelation from a close friend who had one, and so had she.

Lindy West set up #ShoutYourAbortion because for almost five years she kept her abortion a secret, not telling even close friends of her decision to end her pregnancy. However, upon reading her friend’s unapologetic abortion confession on Facebook, the columnist from the US decided she too should make her decision known “” but this time she decided to take the issue global.

“I took one pill, and then another, and lay in my bed for a night and a day, and then I wasn’t pregnant any more. It was a fairly smooth experience, distressing only because my relationship was bad and I had no money. The procedure itself was a relief. Not being able to have it would have been the real trauma,” Lindy’s story read for thegardian.com.

She said not talking about her personal experience with abortion was not a conscious act but that it felt like a habit, “We don’t talk about it because we don’t talk about it”, she wrote.

Her friend’s confession on Facebook was in relation to plans to turn funds away from the abortion clinic she had attended to terminate her own pregnancy. She said her abortion was accompanied with no regret, sadness or shame but happiness and relief.

So moved by her confession, Lindy screen grabbed her friend’s story and set up the hashtag on Twitter with the title: Don’t whisper, #ShoutYourAbortion.

She said the response was immediate. “It felt, almost, as if many had been waiting for this moment to speak. People I’ve known for years told me stories I’d never heard before. Complete strangers shared a galaxy of personal experiences, from the harrowing to the mundane.”

One woman wrote, “My abortion gave my life back… started my healing from rape. No regrets, not one.”

Another said, “No traumatic backstory: Didn’t want kids. Couldn’t afford kids. Contraceptive failed with casual bf. Not one regret.”

Among the positive response however, there has been a serious of extreme posts, some including pictures of bloody foetuses and death threats.

“I own my body, and I decide what I allow to grow in it. Telling our stories at full volume chips away at stigma, at lies, at the climate of shame that destroys the lives (sometimes literally) of women and girls and anyone anywhere on the gender spectrum who can become pregnant, especially those living in poverty, in rural areas and in hyper-religious and conservative households,” Lindy wrote.

Thousands upon thousands of people have since used the hashtag, sharing their relief in being able to confess and rid themselves of the stress associated not with the procedure itself, but the opinions of others who might shame them.

So here is my two cents:

There are many things in this world we should feel ashamed about, abortion is not one of them. It’s a personal choice and one that is made with a conscious mind and heart.

#ShoutYourAbortion is not about dismissing the stigma as a simple medical procedure, it’s about allowing people to feel okay with their choice “” no regrets, no shame.

Will you #ShoutYourAbortion?