It’s Time To Talk About Domestic Violence

It’s around the fourth date when the conversion of “exes” is brought up. It’s an awkward conversation, which has ended with one side of the new relationship calling their former partner every name under the sun, hiding the the hurtful truth behind a barrel of abusive slang.

But what happens if you find out the ex behind all these colourful words was more than the average jerk? What if they were actually abusive?

Sadly, this is the reality many Australian women faced last year, with just under half a million reporting that they had experienced physical or sexual violence or sexual assault.

Now, while it may not be a comfortable topic, domestic violence (or DV) is incredibly common, and often is kept behind closed doors.

For those who have escaped the abuse, it’s women shelters and charitable organisations that provide them with the support to get back on their feet, but it’s often other women leading the charge.

One man taking the helm against domestic violence is Chris Michels, who previously ran an organisation in QLD that collected household essentials for complete strangers who escaped a torturous past.

“I believe it is up to the men to make the conversation about domestic violence happen, rather than the other way around. When you look at domestic violence pages and followers, they are all women fighting for each other. There is a real trend of women helping women, not men helping women, which is wrong because in most cases men are the perpetrators,” Chris says.

“If you’re a man, you just need to educate yourself to walk away. If you feel like you’re going to hit someone or you’re getting upset, you need to walk away, leave, the choice should never be ‘I am going to hit someone’, or worse,” says Chris.

“We just need more men to start this conversation, get involved and make a change.”

Domestic Violence Defined “” The Need-to-Know

Domestic violence can be defined as patterns of behavior in a relationship used to gain power and control over a partner. Abuse can be physical, sexual, emotional, economic, psychological, or some combination thereof. It can happen to anyone of any gender, race, age, sexual orientation, religion, profession, education, or socioeconomic background, and within couples who are married, living together, or dating.

In Australia:

• A woman is killed almost every week by a current or former partner
• One in three women have experienced physical violence since the age of 15
• Almost one in five women have experienced sexual assault.

Around the world:

• The World Health Organisation estimates that at least one in three women will be beaten, raped, or otherwise abused during her lifetime
• In most cases of domestic violence the abuser is a member of the family.

To help bring attention to this important issue and the people working hard to do something about it, we have put together a list of organisations working to assist survivors and educate people about domestic violence and what we can do to end it.

White Ribbon

White Ribbon work to change the attitudes and behaviours that lead to violence against women through a network of support services in each state, there to assist 24/7.

1800 RESPECT

AWAVA

The Australian Women Against Violence Alliance (AWAVA) ensures that women’s voices, particularly marginalised women’s voices, are heard by Government, harnessing and amplifying the work of its member organisations, friends and supporters.

Australian Childhood Foundation

The Australian Childhood Foundation is a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to supporting children and families devastated by abuse, family violence and neglect.

Kids Help Line

Kids Helpline is a free, 24 hour counselling service for young people aged 5-25 years. Counselling is offered by phone, email and over the web.

1800 55 1800

LifeLine

Lifeline is a national charity providing all Australians experiencing a personal crisis with access to 24 hour crisis support and suicide prevention services.

13 11 14

Mensline

A dedicated service for men with relationship and family concerns.

National Sexual Assault, Family & Domestic Violence Counselling Line

A service providing a domestic violence counselling line.

1800 RESPECT

Relationships Australia

Relationships Australia is a leading provider of relationship support services for individuals, families and communities.

1300 364 277