My Toddler Is A Boob Addict

Unstructured Weaning

I had to work out how I was going to bring this to a halt. I was petrified, to be honest. How the hell was I going to get him to sleep? When big noises scared him, how would I calm him? When I wanted to sit still for ten minutes, how would I coax him? We’ve all got our tricks we use to soothe, calm and settle, my boobs were mine, so what would I do when breastfeeding wasn’t an option?

I started to think that maybe the inquisitors were right, maybe I would have to show up to his third-grade classroom for booby time! But then I saw sense and realised that seeing as millions of women before had done it, perhaps I should not stress myself silly over it and just go with it. I knew it was something I would have to do slowly and gently, as with all big changes. I started the ball rolling, with just baby steps as it were, substituting where I could. If he woke during the night, I would rock or pat him back to sleep if it was possible, and during the day, I offered more enticing things like burger rings (I’m not perfect) or an awesome new water bottle to drink out of. I read about dropping feeds, but his breastfeeding was erratic grazing at best, and apart from bedtime and wake-up times, I couldn’t pinpoint exact times to know if I had ‘eliminated a feed’ as such, but I could see we were definitely decreasing!

Distraction Therapy

And bribery”¦I’m not above bribery, turns out I’m quite good at it actually! One friend said she offered her toddler a lollipop instead of a breast one day and hey presto, weaning accomplished. If only it were always that easy.  It took five days for us to relinquish breastfeeding. Books, toys, play dough, more books, whatever it took to move the attention away from ‘wanting bouba’ to an activity, was the key to our weaning process.

We had two attempts at weaning. Illness reinstated breastfeeding a few months after the first go and an unrelated emergency surgery not long after made me very happy to be breastfeeding him again for comfort and immunity reasons. A month after the surgery, our ‘big boy’ turned three and we discussed, again, that would mean bouba was just for his baby brother now. After a couple of stories at bedtime, I would ask if he would like me to pat or rub his arm or back to go to sleep, and that was that.  It took another five days before he stopped asking, but he was ok with it, apparently being a big three-year-old was much more important!

The Last Dance

The day is looming when I won’t be breastfeeding. All the times I’ve loved it, the times I’ve been absolutely over it, will all be in our past and our journey will be complete. It’s been a big part of my baby’s early years that I have been very grateful for and, I won’t lie, I’ll be sad to see it end. But before then, I’ll need to wean yet another breast-obsessed toddler. I thought this second baby, an independent, headstrong little boy, might not be as interested in ye old bouba like his big brother was but yep, he’s in it for the long haul too. I just went to re-settle the little guy, who is now just over two years old, and I gave him a drink of water, put on a dry nappy and patted his back while he went back to sleep”¦and I realised”¦I’m already weaning him. I didn’t plan it, I didn’t make a date, it’s just happening slowly. One day, we’ll have that talk.  And I’m not worried, because as I watch him sleep I look at the soft, blue blanket wrapped protectively around his leg, and think about what would happen if we lost that blanket or if he had to give it up, and the fallout that would ensue. Now that’s a dilemma I don’t even want to think about!

Is your toddler breast-obsessed?