Be Kind To Yourself

We all know that, as Mums, we usually put our own needs and wants last; it’s part and parcel of the whole Mum gig. We know the importance of being a happy Mum and wife to ensure a happy family, but it can be really hard to find the time and energy to take time out for yourself. But the worst thing is that we tend to beat ourselves up about the job we are doing and a startling number of Mums believe they aren’t entitled to ‘me time’, or that it simply isn’t a priority. SAHM takes a look at ways to give yourself a break, emotionally! Take a little time to be kind to yourself, after all, you are the only person who really knows you the best!

Take A Look In The Mirror

This is not a body image article, we dont want you to get naked and critique or compliment your body. Stand in front of the mirror and take a good look at the woman staring back at you. She’s awesome and you need to tell her. Accept that the bathroom may be a mess, the kids might be screaming outside the door and you may be running late, but take 30 seconds to smile at the woman in the mirror, like you would a friend in the street. Recognise that you are doing the very best you can (even if you aren’t today!) and you are enough.

Great Gratitude

I heard about this concept somewhere and thought it was a bit silly, but it really worked for me. Make a mental or physical note everytime you experience something you are grateful for. I dont always write mine down, but I find just stopping for a quick moment to acknowledge the smallest things I’m grateful for have really brightened my day. Things like “I’m grateful my daughter has such a great personality” or “I’m grateful for chocolate”  or even “I’m so grateful I learnt how to wipe a shitty bum and talk on the phone at the same time” are just little things that MAKE me reflect on the small but delightful things in life!

Lower Your Standards

Lowering your standards does not mean neglecting the things that are important, it simply means prioritising them to lighten your workload. You don’t HAVE to read to your child every night, you don’t HAVE to mop the floor every other day. You don’t HAVE to fold and sort washing – I’ve had weeks where the kids lived out of washing baskets with their clothes thrown in and deposited at their bedroom door. There is no such thing as perfect, and when you see examples of perfect parenting and womanhood on Instagram, Facebook, TV and other media, it’s usually because it’s a once off occurrence and it took them hours to achieve! If you’re feeling overwhelmed with it all, map out the basics, make a list of your NEED to do and WANT to do and work from there.

Don’t Push It All The Time

We are all the victims of our own criticism, and sometimes we need to just step back and say, “Hey, be kind to yourself!”. A perfect example is when you miss a workout at the gym or didn’t go for your nightly power walk because you just didn’t feel like it. Dont beat yourself up, just be kind to yourself and acknowledge that you probably needed the break. Want to take that extra shift at work but couldn’t find a baby sitter? Had to pull an all nighter because your assignment needed doing and you know it’s not up to scratch? Don’t beat yourself up, whats done is done. You wouldn’t have a go at your friend, dont have a go at yourself!

Detach From Technology

Often the demands of phones, email, social media etc place more stress on us than we realise. The constant beeps and ringtones signalling that someone wants our time and attention can fluster anyone. Turn off your phone, computer, tablet, whatever and enjoy the sensation of being completely unreachable. Even if it’s just for an hour or two whilst you work, or clean, or watch TV. The messages will still be there when you return!

Break Your Routine

If you’re anything like me, you might find that routine is the backbone to running your household. Even just the thought of straying from our usual schedules sends me into anxiety-overdrive, but it can actually be good for you. Blow off footy training and take your kids for icecream instead. Supposed to go grocery shopping? Catch up with a friend for coffee; the shopping can wait. Schedule Free Play and Mental Health Days for both you and your kids and do whatever you feel like doing!

Being kind to yourself is not just an important part of being a Mum, it’s an important part about being human. You need to treat yourself the same way you would treat a good friend, with empathy, respect and love.

How do you find ways to be kind to yourself?