Rise Of The Threenager

Under one just for fun, terrible (but terribly cute) twos, and now this!

The Parent Trap

As you gaze at your new baby, you could never imagine them being cheeky or downright naughty, let alone having to pull them into line with some sort of discipline. It all seems so far in the distance, so much so that when they turn into push-their-boundaries-and-luck toddlers, it can come as a bit of a surprise. Do you scowl or giggle at the catapult of weeties across the room? What about their first foray into yelling out mispronounced words? In a store full of big clocks with a little kid that can’t say the ‘L’ sound can make for a pretty hilarious situation. Not everyone may agree with you on what you see as amusing and what you decide needs remedial action. What most will agree with you on is this — when it comes to Threenagers, you’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t!

Collision Course

You’re probably going to come into contact with one of these critters at some stage in your parenting career. It’s pretty much inevitable and it causes parenting confusion at its finest, because threenager behaviour (highly emotional, bipolar-like mood swings interspersed with periods of complete ignorance), is a show of independence and decision-making. Isn’t that what we’re aiming for in the long run? Who wants to squash that? As parents, we’re trying to help our kids develop a set of personal skills to enable them to handle the big emotions and that can take time. And the long run seems a long way off indeed. For now, we just want them to do as we ask (like, right now), eat what they’re given (all of it) and go to sleep in a timely manner (before I pass out), all because we said so and we’re the grown-ups. Unfortunately for us, the Threenagers think they are too”¦ok, we all want to be the boss, but what’s with the behavioural slide?

Mirror, Mirror

Who is my child reflecting most of all? Me? Nah”¦well, yeah probably. I’ll admit it. It’s what our kids do, not because they want to annoy us 24/7, but because they absolutely adore us, so they do all that we do. Even the bad-parent stuff, and for me, that’s dropping the F-bomb in frustration.

I recall the time I pulled up at road works for all of seven seconds and our four-year-old leant forward announcing his displeasure at being held up for kindy with very direct ‘F#*k’s Sake!'”¦ A total copy-cat moment of which I’m not entirely proud, but it was in context, and that’s impressive, so I will secretly applaud.

Continue the chaos on the next page…